Yesterday I...

-Almost ran over a midget with a stroller (I really couldn't see her!)

-Saw a crackhead with trembling hands scraping sugar cookies off of the sidewalk.

-Saw a rooftop chase involving swarms of police and an obese thug. A multitude of cops pinned the porky criminal down on a rooftop right outside my window. It's nice living on the 21st floor, you get an aerial view of all the metropolitan action.

...And that is why I love you New York.

Turd Cookies

The family I live with/work for recently purchased the glorious and dangerously addictive video game console known as the Wii. It is a virtual adventure and I've had the pleasure of dabbling in fun games such as Super Paper Mario, Wii Sports, and Cooking Mama. Cooking Mama is particularly enjoyable as it was made in Japan and the "Cooking Mama" character cheers you on as you follow the recipes for international cuisines such as paella, sushi, mochi, curry, custard, beef in wine sauce, cream puffs, etc. She utilizes strong, succint phrases to encourage the virtual cooker such as, "Wonderful! Better than mama!" Although, the character has a thick Japanese accent and it sounds more like, "WUN-DAH-FOO! BETTAH ZEN MAMA!" PC or not, it's undeniably hilarious.

After a copious amount of time creating pixelated dishes and desserts, I was inspired to do some actual, tangible baking. My sweet little Mina agreed that chocolate chip cookies would be splendid. Cooking is a productive and positive activity for the wee children to engage in because it involves tactile stimulation and light math (that's my cover story, I mainly chose the activity because I had a serious hankering for something sweet). My faithful little baking assistant did a marvelous job of dumping the ingredients in the bowl, stirring said ingredients, and helping me roll the dough into little balls. After a few overwhelming messes were made, we had double chocolate chip cookies baking in the oven.

Mina accurately described the appearance of the dough by stating that it, "looked like poop." Once baked and sampled, we were relieved to discover that the rich, decadent cookies were the furthest thing from feces. That's always a relief.


I think that's a culinary accomplishment that would earn a Gold medal from Cooking Mama. Also, how could one not give a gold medal to that face?

They Prefer to Be Called, "Little Felines"

Lately it feels as though my cranial fluid has been replaced with gruel. Ergo, I haven't felt inspired to write much hence the lack of blogging. Thankfully, my haze of mental lethargy has temporarily lifted because a sweet muse has encouraged me to put my fingertips to the keypad again. Thank you dear, wondrous Magpie cat, for you have shown me that there is indeed beauty to express in the form of the written word.

This weekend, a friend told me to Google the term "Munchkin Cats." I'm a good girl and did what I was told, little did I know the bevy of amusement that was in store...

This lil' fella looks as though he got caught in the middle of something sneaky. Aw, midget kittens will run the devil bowlegged with their mischief.
Hmmm, this one looks shifty and has a furtive glint in its eye as well. Perhaps it's a characteristic unique to the breed...
Yep. This affirms it. This is a mutant species that is secretly plotting to conquer mankind.
Awwww, secretive or not, that's the cutest friggin' critter I've seen since Gizmo in "Gremlins." They're like little Corgis...
...but with short hair, and, you know...they're, um, cats.

And last but definitely not least, here's a cat that holds the proud title of "Munchkin, The Monster Cat." I think I speak for everyone reading this asinine entry when I say:

Hahahahaha, hee hee hee, ho, ho, ho, ha! Whew, life. Amazing. That thing looks like John Goodman stuffed into a Garfield costume.

Ok, so it wasn't a verbose blog that had any weight or literary value- but it's a start! Ugh, writer's block sucks. I feel like Barton Fink...hey, John Goodman was in that movie...

Here's more cat fun for shits and giggles: